瑞籍人類學家 David Signer 報導台灣，原德文已被譯為荷、英、中文。文中所述與事實有些許差入，也無深度分析，但我還是讀得高興，因為我既被諷又看得出其中的趣味：

台灣 30% 的人每週工作超過 62 小時。台灣人口密度只低於孟加拉。雖然台灣面積小於瑞士，卻是 20 個最成功的工業國家之一：台灣是筆記型電腦製造的領導先驅，有世界第三大外匯存款，也是手機密度最高的地區（每人 1.14 支）。然而，只有三個國家的性生活少於台灣，且法國「Elle」雜誌認為台灣女性是世界上最不快樂的。台灣同時也是最多近視的國家。…

我在台北時拜訪了一位外科醫生，他六歲的女兒已經在學校學英文，但是在晚間，她除了再學英文之外，還有繪畫、舞蹈和鋼琴。她很驕傲地不用樂譜就彈得出古典曲子。八月，他們全家會到美國去，讓女兒參加兩週的暑期營隊，以增進英文能力。我問這個父親，難道他不怕給孩子太多壓力？不是常聽說，日本孩子因考試失敗感到羞恥而自殺嗎？「是的，有時所有努力會化為烏有。」醫生說，「比如有些鋼琴神童，十四歲就能將琴彈得很完美，但到了 25 歲時，他們彈琴的技巧則無異於從十歲才學起的水平。」…

一個長時間住在台灣和中國的瑞士女人告訴我：「對這些人來說，重要的是錢和吃，愛與性不重要。如果有人說我愛你，那是沒有意義的。但是如果他給你一塊盤子裡的肉，你就知道，你對他來說很重要。」

（原英文翻譯有少部份忽略，我對以上中英文翻譯皆有修改。）

David Signer, a Swiss anthropologist, wrote an article on Taiwan that was translated from German into Dutch, English, and Mandarin. He’s a bit off on the facts and light on analysis, but I enjoyed the article anyway because I both see and take part in the irony he describes:

Over 30% of the people work more than 62 hours a week. Taiwan’s population is less dense than only Bangladesh. Although Taiwan is smaller then Switzerland it belongs to the 20 most successful industrial countries: Taiwan leads the laptop market, has the third largest foreign reserve in the world, and has the most mobile phones (1.14) per capita. However, only three countries have less sex then the Taiwanese, and the French magazine “Elle” names Taiwanese women as the unhappiest women in the world. Taiwan has also the most near-sighted people. …

In Taipei I visit a surgeon at his home. His 6-year-old daughter is taught English at school, but she has extra classes English in the evenings besides painting, dance and piano lessons. With proudness she plays classic piano parts without music paper. In August the whole family goes to the USA to improve her English even more at a summer camp. I ask the father if he is not afraid that the pressure on the kids might be too high. From Japan more and more stories are heard of children who commit suicide because of the shame of failing an exam. “Yes, sometimes all the effort is for nothing,” says the surgeon. “Sometimes the musical wonder kids play virtuously when they are 14, but when they become 25 the difference fades between the kids who started only at the age of 10”. …

A Swiss woman who lived in Taiwan and China for a long time says: “the only thing that counts for these people is food and making money. Love and sex are not important. If somebody says ‘I love you’, then it means nothing, but if he gives you a big piece of his meat then you know you are important for him.”

(The English translation is a bit incomplete. I’ve revised both translations slightly above.)